The term “Spanner” is a British word for wrench. Throwing a Spanner in the works is a euphemism for fucking with something.

I’ve resisted for sometime now about throwing my feelings out about E Bikes. Regardless of my current feelings, I’m sure I’ll be old enough for one someday, so I don’t want to sound condescending or uppity. But the truth is, an E Bike isn’t a bicycle, it’s a motorcycle by pure definition of the word. If you look up the definition of a motor, it’s an electrical device designed to produce energy. An engine uses combustion to produce energy. Therefore what we’ve always called “motorcycles”, are really enginecycles. I know, I know, I’m making shit up here, but I’m trying to make a point.

The irony that the bicycle industry has purveyed about the fact that E Bikes still require one to pedal is an illusion. Most E Bikes on the easiest setting reduce the human requirements by 20%. That’s a lot. Especially going uphill. Especially over the course of a long ride. 20% of a 30 mile road ride is 6 miles. Since it’s well proven that most mountain bike rides require two to three times the energy of a road ride, you’re talking about a lot of saved energy with an E Bike. So to extrapolate, it’s safe to say that an E Biker riding on the medium setting has to ride close to 50 miles to equal the same energy output as a regular biker on a 30 mile ride.

To say that E Bikes require the same effort as a “real bike” is nonsense. Sorry but that’s how I feel about it.